Towards Closeness to Allah -- Mixing with People of Good Character and Avoiding People of Bad Character

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
In the Name of Allah, Most Merciful, Most Compassionate

Assalaamu alaykum

Dear Friends

I pray that you are well.

It is reported that Al-Fuḍayl b. ʿAyyāḍ (may Allah have mercy on him) said: "Do not mix except with those who have good character; for the one who has good character brings nothing but good, whilst the one who has bad character brings nothing but evil." [Al-Bayhaqi, Shuʿab Al-Īmān, #87044]

What is good character (the opposite is bad character)?

Good character is one that is sound and upright; in terms of its principles, fundamentals and etiquette, based on submission and adherence to the teachings of Islam, in obedience to Allah and His Messenger.

It is the character that learns its etiquette and bases its principles on the Qur’an and Sunnah. It is the character that seeks to apply those teachings by following the example of the early generations of the ummah and of the righteous among them who achieve a great deal in that field.

Good character is based on belief in Allah and His Messengers, and in His promise and warning, and on adherence to Islamic conduct in a complete way, which includes truthfulness, honesty, chastity, modesty, good attitude, excellent treatment towards parents, kindness to neighbors, hastening to do good, helping people to do what is right, refraining from harming others, and other aspects of Islamic conduct.

The basis of the good character is belief in Allah and His Messenger, and submission to and compliance with the rulings, principles and etiquette of Islam.

A story of a man who found gold - an exemplar of good character.

Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wassallam said:

“A man bought a piece of land from another man, and the buyer found a jar filled with gold in the land. The buyer said to the seller: `Take your gold, as I bought only the land from you and not the gold.' The owner of the land said: `I sold you the land with everything in it.' So both of them took their case before a third man who asked: `Have you any children?' One of them said: `I have a boy.' The other said, `I have a girl.' The man said: `Marry the girl to the boy and spend the money on them; and whatever remains give it in charity.''' [Bukhari and Muslim]

There is no doubt that the Muslim is influenced by his/her companion, especially if he/she loves his/her companion dearly, because that love makes him/her turn a blind eye to his/her companion’s sins and errors, and it may lead him/her to admire him/her to such an extent that he/she begins to imitate him /her in everything, even the way he/she walks or dresses. This is something that is seen a great deal and no one can deny it.

Moreover, one of the negative consequences of being with someone who has bad character is that that you will also become a focal point for fools and human “wolves” who will judge you in the same way as they judge your friend/companion. This companionship/friendship will turn to enmity of the Day of Resurrection, because it was not based on adhering to the laws of Allah and obeying Him.

ٱلْأَخِلَّآءُ يَوْمَئِذٍۭ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلَّا ٱلْمُتَّقِينَ ﴿٦٧

Close friends, that Day, will be enemies to each other, except for the righteous (67) [Qur'an, Az-Zukhruf 43:67]

Al-Qurtubi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “Friends on that Day” i.e., the Day of Resurrection “will be foes one to another” i.e., they will be enemies to one another and will curse one another “except Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)” who will be friends in this world and in the Hereafter. [Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 16/95]

Ibn Katheer (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Tafseer Ibn Katheer (7/237): That is, every friendship that was for the sake of anything other than Allah will, on the Day of Resurrection, turn into enmity, except for that which was for the sake of Allah, may He be glorified and exalted; it will last forever.

What the Muslim must do is to keep away from bad companions and choose righteous friends who will guide him towards what is good and help him to obey his Lord, may He be exalted. As the saying goes: tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are.

The poet ‘Adiyy ibn Zayd said:

Do not ask about the man; look at his friend, for a man will follow in the footsteps of his friends.

It is sufficient deterrent from having bad friends for the Muslim to remember the warning against that, that is mentioned in the Prophet’s Sunnah:

It was narrated that Abu Musa al-Ash‘ari (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“The likeness of a good companion and a bad companion is that of one who carries musk and one who works the bellows. With the carrier of musk, either he will give you some or you will buy some from him, or you will notice a good smell from him; as for the one who works the bellows, either he will burn your clothes or you will notice a bad smell from him.”

[Narrated by Bukhari, 1995; Muslim, 2628]

Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him) said: Keeping company with good people is one of the best of deeds that bring one closer to Allah, and is one of the best means of attaining blessing. On the other hand, keeping company with bad people such as disbelievers and those who commit sin openly is not permissible, and is one of the things that lead to a bad end and cause one to adopt their attitudes and deeds.

What the believer must do is try hard to keep company with good people and avoid keeping company with bad people.

Allah calls upon the believer to fear Him and tells us how we can accomplish that--by being with the truthful--those who are true in what they say and what they do.

يَـٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ ٱتَّقُوا۟ ٱللَّـهَ وَكُونُوا۟ مَعَ ٱلصَّـٰدِقِينَ ﴿١١٩

O you who believe, fear Allah and be with those who are true (in words and deeds).

[Qur'an At-Tawba 9:119]

If we keep bad company, we will be sorry in the Day of Judgment. Allah Almighty says,

وَيَوْمَ يَعَضُّ ٱلظَّالِمُ عَلَىٰ يَدَيْهِ يَقُولُ يَـٰلَيْتَنِى ٱتَّخَذْتُ مَعَ ٱلرَّسُولِ سَبِيلًا ﴿٢٧﴾ يَـٰوَيْلَتَىٰ لَيْتَنِى لَمْ أَتَّخِذْ فُلَانًا خَلِيلًا ﴿٢٨﴾ لَّقَدْ أَضَلَّنِى عَنِ ٱلذِّكْرِ بَعْدَ إِذْ جَآءَنِى ۗ وَكَانَ ٱلشَّيْطَـٰنُ لِلْإِنسَـٰنِ خَذُولًا ﴿٢٩

And the Day the wrongdoer will bite on his hands [in regret] he will say, "Oh, I wish I had taken with the Messenger a way. (27) Oh, woe to me! I wish I had not taken that one as a friend. (28) He led me away from the remembrance after it had come to me. And ever is Satan, to man, a deserter."

(29) [Qur'an Al-Furqan 25:27-29]

May Allah make us of those who are truthful and grant us righteous companions who can help us come close to Him. May Allah keep us away from those things that would lead us astray and incur His wrath. Ameen.

And Allah knows best and He alone grant success.

Allahumma salli 'ala Muhammad wa 'ala aalihi wa sahbihi wassallam.

Wassalaam