special day in my life

I was attend my friend graduation day...i am very happy to spent a time with them..
and that feeling has been lost for a long time ..to get some love ,friendship and caring from one to another...

i can feel special feeling for how they united and valued friendship..but dont know why after come back home ,i feel kind of empty of feeling again...i really afriad to be alone


since i back from thailand this january..i try to forgot everything that make me feel the most worse feeling in my life..but now little by little i feel better of it.i am going to start something news in my life..let new people walk in to my life and try to plan different life for my self...to travel ,writting books ,photographe and getting marry ...insha ALLAH

I Will give myself one year to settle down my self and work ,try to improved for my work skill and islamic knowledge before to find someone to marry here..for one who can take care of me ,,i think money is not all importance for me.the most importance is mutual trust and love ,care to each other...ever forever ..i already forgot how to love someone for a long time..i totally lose for that feeling ..maybe i still dont meet someone who i can feel rely on ...but i try to and tend to it

chinese said sometime u wont be always follow by what u have plan...

my another dream is keep studing in egypt and master for islmic knowledge ,

you do not will anything unless ALLAH will it to you